Does size matter? I address this topic in the weight management classes I teach. Size matters only if you let it matter. People often remark on how skinny I am. Growing up, I found comments like that to be hurtful because size is often associated with strength and virility. At a time when I was trying to attract the opposite sex, comments like that would cut my manliness down to size.
Some people associate big appetites with masculinity as well. For instance, Brian Wansink studied how people behave on first dates. While women tend to eat less than they normally would, men tend to eat more. I guess men feel they need to overcompensate for something.
In Man With a Pan, John Donohue shares a collection of stories written by men who cook for their families. Shankar Vedantam explores the topic of gender bias in cooking. Studies suggest people associate home cooking with females and professional cooking with males. Jesse Green shares the perspective of cooking in a gay family. In his relationship, family duties are assigned based on individual strengths. While Jesse cooks when the couple host a dinner party, his partner is better suited toward practical day to day meals for the kids.
When I thought about what makes a man manly, I realized that I need look no further than my own dad. My dad has always provided for his family. He works long hours as a cardiologist and when he comes home, he continues working to support his family. Whether he is working on the yard, or working on the house, he is always taking care of his family. Despite the fact that he doesn't enjoy cooking, I remember coming down several mornings to find that my dad had cooked up a couple of sausage links for me.
Because of the example that my dad set, I strive to be a hard-working dad for my own kids. There are no male or female jobs. When I think of how I can step up and take care of my family, I can think of nothing more manly than cooking for my kids. In the following video, I show you a manly dish for Korean Mackerel Stew that you can serve your own kids:
References
Wansink, Brian. 2006. Mindless eating: why we eat more than we think. New York: Bantam Books.
Donohue, John. 2011. Man with a pan: culinary adventures of fathers who cook for their families. Chapel Hill, N.C.: Algonquin Books of Chapel Hill.
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